Interview

Kristen, a friend of mine from church, had a great interview from a friend on her blog. I loved reading it and getting to know her better. She sent me these questions to answer on my blog, so here goes...

1.) You're a first-time mom with an adorable little boy. What has surprised you the most about motherhood?

Wow! So many things...I have worked with children all my life, but it is very different when the child is your own and is with you 24/7! I think that what has surprised me the most is that I could so completely love this little miracle and want to do absolutely anything and everything that I possibly can to make sure he's happy and healthy. If someone could be a fly on the wall in my house during the day, they would definitely get a kick out of what they see...I'm sure that all the dancing, singing, laughing, noise-making, tickling, and funny faces are quite a sight!

It was a huge transition for me to go from working full-time (and a part-time job on top of that) to being a stay-at-home mom. I was so used to being on the go all the time and constantly surrounded by lots of people, and now most of my time is spent at home with just my little guy for company. But I feel so fortunate to be able to stay at home with him and watch him grow and learn and explore the world around him...I can't imagine missing out on these days!

We had a number of problems in the hospital, and even with the help of numerous lactation consultants, we could never get Joshua to latch on correctly for breastfeeding. This was absolutely heartbreaking for me, as breastfeeding was something that I had so much looked forward to doing. After many tear-filled days, I decided that even though things hadn't worked out like I had imagined they would, I could still give my best to my baby. I bought a pump and I started pumping so that I would be able to give milk to Joshua, even if it had to be in a bottle. For anyone else who exclusively pumps, they know that this is not easy! Being hooked to a pump for hours a day, having to haul bottles and pumping stuff whenever we travel, trying to entertain Joshua while I'm pumping...none of it is what I had imagined, and I certainly wouldn't have made this my first choice, but this is probably the greatest example to me of how much I love this little guy. I certainly can't think of anyone else I'd go through all this for! But every single time I see his sweet little face and his cute little tummy and chubby legs, it makes it all worth it :)

2.) Education is very important to you. Who or what influenced your academic career the most?

This one is easy--my parents. My dad is the smartest person I know, and he made sure that I knew how important learning and education were from a very young age. I can remember being in the 1st grade and telling my dad that we didn't have any homework that night. He decided that he didn't like that answer, so he made me write all my spelling words ten times each. I, of course, thought that he was the meanest dad ever...but I got a 100 on my spelling test :) My dad never let me take the easy route. When other kids were doing simple science fair projects, my dad had me making pin hole cameras and testing different materials' insulation properties. When my friends were taking fun classes as electives in high school, my dad had me taking additional AP and honors classes. At the time, all of this seemed like parental torture, but I couldn't be more grateful now. Because of all that work, I was able to go to Carolina for undergrad and grad school, and I definitely had the whole studying thing down to a science long before most of my peers.

While my dad was the greatest influence for my hard work and determination, my mom has been the influence for my educational and vocational interests. My mom is such a kind, caring, giving, and generous person. She had to work full-time when I was growing up, but she was always there for my brother and me...at all of our games and performances, helping me review vocabulary for tests, and serving as an incredible example by helping others at church, in our schools, and in our community. Growing up, I always wanted to have a career that allowed me to help others...this changed over time from teaching, to environmental law, to physical therapy.

When I got to college, however, I realized that psychology was an area that I was really interested in learning about, and in a discussion with a professor my sophomore year, I learned about graduate studies in social work. So I graduated with a double major in psychology and Spanish, and then went to Carolina's School of Social Work. I had a great internship in the public schools, and also got my licensure in school social work, which is where I worked until Joshua was born.

While I was in college, I also started working with the Arc of Orange County, which is a non-profit organization that works with individuals and families with developmental disabilities. I worked with some of the greatest kids ever, and continued that for 7 years, up until Joshua arrived on the scene :)

Both of these jobs allowed me to do what I love--helping others--for a living...what a blessing!

3.) You and David make such a cute couple. Where did you meet and what was it that made you realize he was "the one"?

People often think that David and I are brother and sister--I guess we look alike :) Maybe that's why we're cute?

We met at church in the singles' ward. I had just joined the church in March after 2 years of investigating, and David came home from his mission in April. I was friends with his older sister Shelley, and we had a number of friends in common. There was absolutely zero interest when we first met, but after being friends and spending so much time together, I think we started to see each other in a different light. We definitely bring out the best in each other--David helps me relax and slow down and enjoy life more, and I've been able to encourage him in his schooling and work. We both love our families and were very excited to start our own. David is such a good daddy and I fall more in love with him every single time I see him with Joshua. Joshua absolutely lights up when he sees David, and that just melts my heart :)

4.) I've heard you say how much you love your parents. How has your perspective on your parents changed, now that you are a parent yourself? Do you view your childhood any differently and if so, how?

I think that my perspective on my parents first changed once I went off to college, because I realized that my parents had worked so hard and sacrificed so much to provide for my brother and me, and to teach us and be good examples to us as we grew up. With each year that has passed, I become more and more aware of all that they did without and all of the hard decisions that they made so that we could become the kind of people that they wanted us to be. Now that I am a parent, I want to follow in their footsteps! Like I said in my answer to the first question, I want to do anything and everything I can so that Joshua has what he needs.

My mother sent me an email last Mother's Day that talked about "mean moms." It was a satirical view of a young man's childhood where he described how he had the meanest mom ever: she made the family eat dinner together every night, she had an earlier curfew for him than any of his friends had, she made him do his homework before he could go out and play...the list went on and on. And of course, as he grew up, he realized that she did all of these things because she loved him. My mom concluded the email by saying she hoped that I appreciated having a "mean mom." I was pregnant at the time, and I told her that Joshua needed to prepare himself, because he was going to have the "meanest" mom ever!

My parents are my heroes and I look up to them so much. If Joshua grows up and can say the same things about me, I will feel so blessed.

5.) If you knew you could not or would not fail (and money and time were no object), what is the one thing you'd like to do or what one dream would you live out?

This was the toughest question by far...there are so many things I'd like to do. At the end of my life, I want to know that I have made a difference and that the world, in small ways, is better for my having been here. Most importantly, I want to be a good mother and provide my children with all of the love and support and encouragement that they need to become good and loving people.

I would want to do something that would help my family and others. I don't have any one ultimate "dream" that could easily answer this question, but if I had to imagine something, I really like the idea of having a home on a big piece of land near a lake or a river. I'd want to create a place where children could come to feel special and enjoy nature. I'd have a big garden where we could all work to grow food that the kids could take home to their families and that we could donate to local food banks and soup kitchens. I'd have room for the children to run around and play games, to swim, and to camp. I'd invite their families to come and eat and play with their children. Having worked with children with disabilities and children in poverty, I know how these simple things could make such a difference for these kids, and how fulfilling it would be to be able to bring joy into their lives. It would be great for my children, as well, to meet all kinds of children and learn from them and be able to grow as they give.

**If you would like to be interviewed by me, leave a comment and your email address, and I'll send you 5 questions to post, along with your answers, on your blog!**